Condom Color

A just-married Chinese couple decided to make love on the wedding night in the hotel where they held their wedding. The wife did not want to get pregnant and requested the husband to buy condom from the shop nearby. When the husband left, the wife waited anxiously in the room with all the lights switched off.

The husband had a hard time looking for a shop that sell condom and when he finally found one, he realized that he had only one 20 cents coin. He asked the shop owner to sell him one piece of condom and the shop owner asked him which quality does he want. "The white condom, lowest quality, is 15 cents each. The black condom, average quality, is 20 cents each. And the purple condom, highest quality, is 25 cents each." So the husband took the black condom as he had only 20 cents with him.

While the husband was out, a black Indian thief came into the room. The wife did not notice and thought that it was her husband. She grabs the thief and happily screwing away. The wife was so exhausted that she felt asleep immediately.

When he reach the hotel, he found his wife sleeping. Without a warning, he jump onto his wife and started making love. The wife was surprised that the husband was so energetic as she enjoyed the session.

A year later, the wife gave birth to a black baby boy. When the baby grows up, he ask the father "Pa, why am I black and you are white????"

The father shouted "You are damn lucky already, 5 cents more and you would have been PURPLE".

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A lot of jewelries

Mrs. Johnson decided to have her own portrait painted by a very famous artist.
She told the artist, "Paint me with 3-carat diamond earrings, a large diamond necklace, glimmering emerald bracelets, and a beautiful red ruby pendant."
"But ma'am, you are not wearing any of those things."
"I know," said Mrs. Johnson. "My health is not good, and my husband is having an affair with his secretary.When I die I'm sure he will marry her, and I want the bitch to go nuts looking for the jewelry..."

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Honey, my hands are freezing!

Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get to the cabin, the guy goes out to chop some wood to start the fireplace. When he gets back, he says, "Honey, my hands are freezing!" To that she replies "Well, come here and I?ll warm them between my legs." He goes out a couple of more times and does the same thing. After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop wood for the night. When he returns, he again says, "Honey, my hands are really freezing!" She looks at him and says, "For crying out loud, don't your ears ever get cold?"

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Why I give $1000 to the church?

One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the pastor of a small Florida church found a plain pink envelope containing $1000.
It happened again the next week.The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw a little old lady put the distinctive pink envelope in the plate.
This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.
"Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he stated.
"Why yes," she replied, "every week my son sends me money, and I give some of it to the church."
The pastor replied, "That's wonderful, how much does he send you?"
The old lady said, "$10,000 a week."
The pastor was amazed. "Your son is very successful; what does he do for a living?"
"He is a veterinarian," she answered.
"That is an honorable profession," the pastor said. "Where does he practice?"
The little old lady said proudly, "In Nevada. He has two cat houses in Las Vegas and one in Reno."

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Two Chinese Women At A Bar

Two Chinese women were sitting in a bar when they saw two guys fighting over which culture is smartest. When the women heard this they went over and the first lady said," We know a way to figure out which culture is the smartest."

The second lady answered, "Yes we do. The way you figure it out is by seeing which culture uses the less utensils in eating." The men quickly agreed to listen to the women.

The first lady said," Well the Indians use their hands to eat but their hands have five fingers each so they use ten utensils to eat. They aren't the smartest so next come the Americans. They use a fork but there are four tongs on the fork, so they use four utensils. Now come the Chinese. We use chopsticks and there are only two sticks so we are the smartest."

As the lady finished the men sat puzzled for a second then agreed that Chinese were the smartest.

As they left, the second lady said to the first, "That was a good way to get a date and them thinking that we are the smartest."

That teaches us that Chinese are the smartest culture.

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Easily bypass your company or school Internet firewall

http://www.aplusproxy.com I just find this good site. There you can easily bypass your company or school Internet filter.

More and more employers and universities are becoming aware of the amount of time their employees or students are spending using the Internet for personal reasons. They use a firewall or proxy server to restrict access to websites or other Internet protocols. All your Internet communication passes through your network's firewall, so it's no strange that some websites (like myspace) get blocked in your company or school.

Now it's easy to bypass firewall if you visit http://www.aplusproxy.com.

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Naming a Pussy Cat

Once there was a man named Qi Yan who had a pussy cat, and believing it to be rare, named it "Tiger Cat."
One of his guests said, "Brave as a tiger is, it is not so vigorous as a dragon. Why not name it Dragon Cat?"
Another one suggested, "No doubt a dragon is more vigorous than a lion, yet a dragon needs the aid of floating clouds to soar up into the sky. Aren't clouds more noble than a dragon? You'd better call it Cloud Cat."
A third reasoned, "It's true that clouds can cover the sky, but they scatter the moment the wind appears. Wind is more powerful than clouds, so name your cat Wind Cat."
A fourth argued, "However strong the wind is, it is blocked wherever there is a wall, Wall Cat would be much better."
A fifth made his suggestion: "As solid as a wall is, a mouse can make a hole in it. A wall will no longer be strong if there are holes. How can a wall be a match for a mouse? My advice is to call it Mouse Cat."
An old man in the village overheard the men arguing and laughed. "Ah! It's a cat that catches mice. A cat is a cat. Why bother naming it after something else and making it lose its own identity?"

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